The Abandoner
So, to understand the context of this story, we’ve got to go back in time to a drive back to California from Colorado after a Christmas trip. Well, right when we cross the Nevada-California border on I-15, well California has a nice little welcome home gift for us.
Brake lights. Traffic. Bumper to bumper. Yep, this is Southern California.
So we’re sitting there moving along at roughly zero miles per hour when I remember a gift that Tiffany gave me. A radio controlled monster truck that’s sitting in the trunk. So I get out of the car, get my toy car and it plays in real traffic for awhile, going up and down the shoulder, and – sometimes – merging into real traffic between two non-moving cars. Good fun.
And then, without warning, traffic starts to move again. Not fast. Maybe 15 mph or so. But faster than the little radio-controlled car can go. So we start to leave it behind. I have to jump out of the car to snatch it up. Tiffany lets me out as traffic slows again. I run back about 50 yards to pick up the car and as I’m running back toward Tiffany, traffic speeds up again. Instead of waiting for me, Tiffany goes with traffic and starts leaving me behind.
I run in a panic. And catch up. I have to jump into a moving car with Tiffany looking back at me telling me to hurry!…
So that’s the first time Tiffany tried to abandon me. Fast forward to three days after the wedding. We’re in the Fort Lauderdale Airport laid over from Dulles and heading to Saint Thomas.
Only problem is, she’s got my boarding pass in her book.
So I’m sitting in the terminal, unable to board the plane while she finds our seats by herself, unaware that I am now stranded. I ask another passenger to inform her of our situation – that she has abandoned me a second time. I figure she’d have a bit less fun on our honeymoon alone, but you never know with this girl, right?
So I guess they won’t let her off the plane to give me the ticket for security reasons, so finally a stewardess brings my ticket out and they let me get on the plane.
Second time Tiffany tried to ditch me, and we’d only been married 72 hours…
First, I had carried MY OWN luggage on so you didn’t get stuck with the carry ons. And second, well… um… okay, I did abandon you. I was so embarrassed when some man I didn’t know had to tell me that I had left my brand new husband at the gate with no ticket in which to get on the plane. I guess I won’t be living this one down any time soon…
That is hilarious! My father tried to leave my mother in Mexico on their honeymoon. They were crossing the border and my mom realized that she had left her purse in the car, in California. When she told the border guard that my dad could attest to the fact that they were newlyweds and get her bag from the car my dad turned around and said, “I’ve never seen that woman before in my life.”
Hee! Of course, he did get her bag and save her from Mexico but she still tells that story!
belated wedding wishes
Congratulations Mr. & Mrs. Link!!!
I’ve been M.I.A. from lj for a while and it was a nice surprise to come back online to so many wonderful/crazy stories from your wedding. I just can’t get enough!
I’m so happy for you both! Best wishes!
From Mom
Heheheh…keep them guessing baby…nice work. Jed dear be on your toes at all times …Tiffy is a twicky one! Ilove u guys -Mom (Annie )
the decider
your title reminds me of bush’s “i am the decider,” lol.